Doyce was kind enough to direct this little cartoon to me. I don’t think I’ve ever been quite that much in the groove, at least not in parenting, but I try.
I had a thought today, as I was running about the Santa Ana Zoo with Katherine and her cousin Nicholas. Much of the time parenting is spent in a crisis management zone. Where is she now? Can that hurt her? Why is she crying? Is she wet? Is she hungry? When will she need a nap? Could she fall from there? Could she break that? It’s way too easy to stay in that zone, because, like real life, there are more than enough opportunities available to worry.
Even when the dangers become less immediate, I suspect it will still be easy to be in a constant state of low-level alarm. Where is she? Is her homework done? Should she be allowed to that stay-over? Did I get her to the dentist yet this year? Why is she so unhappy about those other girls at school? Does her Girl Scout leader seem trustworthy? How will I afford college for her? Will her grades be enough for a scholarship? Etc.
But that’s a mistake. It’s a mistake that leads to people looking back and saying, “Where did all the time go?” It’s the mistake behind “The Cat’s in the Cradle.” It’s focusing on what could go wrong, and acting and thinking constantly to forestall it, rather than looking at what’s good and enjoying it while one may.
Katherine was zippity-zooming around the playground, up and down the slide, up and down off the big frog, so excited she was letting out a long yell of joy. And I had to just take a moment to enjoy her enjoyment, to see how happy she was, to enjoy coordination and her cheerfulness and her gung-ho attitude.
It was a neat moment. I need to take more of them.